LONG LIVED PHANTOM

So, I just wrapped up reading "Wuthering Heights" by Emily Brontë, and believe me it's worth reading.  On 10th of Sept 2020 , I started reading this book with my friend. I was so so so enthusiastic that I even told one of my friends that I'll be completing this book in just two days. But, Damn!! It took me freakin' 9 days to complete it.  I still remember the first time when I started reading it, I read around 30 pages in a go but hardly understood a single sentence and reading the book initially was really tiresome cos I was constantly searching meanings of different words so so so frequently [This is my only novel so far that actually contains pencil work ]. I was so frustrated the first day, that I even told my friend that I won't be able to read it any further. Second day, I even took a break from this book , and read another classic " The Metamorphosis" by Franz Kafka.  Third day, I finally made up my mind to give it a try once again...

So nowadays I really talk to myself a lot. It's sort of bizarre to think of, but I enjoy it the most. So during one of my recent chats with myself; I literally came across this strange idea which I'll talking in today's blog. I feel that our life is just like that standing coin on the ground; which basically leads to no clear cut conclusion on head or tails. The angle with which we see the coin actually decides its fate. If I am seeing from right/left side , am gonna see a clear cut conclusion; either heads or tails. But if I'm seeing from the top; It's again a dilemma to chose one side. This is actually what really happens with our lives as well. And when the coin is in the air while that flipping process; all we hope to see is just one clear cut conclusion but what we avoid to think about are the possibilities of it ending at nothing. People take decisions (sometimes due to the heat of the moment) and regret them later. And then they try to make some amen...

[Before you even start reading it, there's a bit of a disclaimer that this whole thing is my personal experience and it won't end up in any satisfying positive thought or something like that.] Hi, So this is something I really wanted to talk about for a really long time now and when I say a really long time it means one whole legit week. I really missed blogging my emotional stuff for almost a year now. And I thought this might be the right time to start it all again. This blog is very very very special to me cos it has captured all my mental experiences so well. I remember last year, writing every freaking thing that amazed me or that had an impact on me mentally and still whenever in doubt, I look back to those days virtually here and that's really calming and satisfying. And it's a kind of paragon of hope for me. So, I absolutely have no idea of what am I gonna write here today but all I know is that I really need to put such things out here on this blo...